Number Two

I'm pregnant. It happened faster than I had anticipated. I only got one period after weaning Gemma and then ...boom. I think when we decided to start trying, we were aiming for late August/early September and were thinking that because Gemma took 2 months to conceive, this one would be similar. This little one is due July 30, 2011.

I knew my cycle this time around would be irregular as it's my first period in 19 months. So as much as we were "trying", I didn't expect it to happen. But I felt real crampy 3 weeks in and that's what got me to do a test with Gemma, so I kinda wondered. But I had two negative pregnancy tests in a span of a week, so I thought maybe not. Then a week later, I was sitting at my work desk when I looked over and saw a pile of Kleenex i had blown my nose into. For some reason, that made me think I might be pregnant - I had a super runny/stuffed nose throughout my entire pregnancy with Gemma - and so I did a test. The line was super duper faint, like a trick on the eye. I told Jesse I might be and that I would repeat it the next day.

Then we got hit by a huge snowstorm and I didn't get a chance to get out of the house, so it was a few days before Jesse finally picked one up for me on his way home. It was positive, a much more definite line this time.

When we told my mom right away, she didn't believe us. She just kept asking, "are you serious? are you joking? is this real?" and then finally when we convinced her, she said "ugh, i'm so tired!". LOL. I know that doesn't sound like a very nice reaction, but Gemma was super duper clingy  and so my mom had been holding her pretty well the entire day. She of course is happy for us and is glad we're having two close together because she felt so sorry for my brother (who is 6 years older than me) after I was born as he became very neglected thanks to his very colicky baby sister.

At first, I didn't know how to feel. We were always so wishy-washy about having another baby. Gemma is so perfect to us in every way and we were truthfully afraid of taking attention away from her, afraid of comparing the next baby to Gemma in every way, and we never felt our family was incomplete with just one. We knew it would be nice for Gemma to have a sibling in the long run, but we also felt it wasn't fair to the new baby to just have it for Gemma's sake. We were seriously more than content to be a family of 3 (4 including my mom, 5 including my dog, LOL). Then we thought back to how we felt before we got pregnant with Gemma and all the fears of having a baby and how that was to affect our lives. We were so content to be just to the two of us forever and weren't even sure we wanted to disrupt our twosome. But look at us now... We couldn't be happier with Gemma and can't even begin to imagine not having her in our lives. So this anxiety about baby #2 would be the same - just being afraid of the unknown....

I don't know if the novelty wears off with the second baby or if it's just us because we had all these fears about #2, but the first week after finding out has been a weird one. We both would constantly forget that I'm pregnant. With Gemma I felt like I was always going to blurt it out to everyone, but with #2 it hardly crosses our minds. Isn't that weird? It just wouldn't sink in.

Yesterday I had my first doctor's appointment. I don't know if I just HAD to hear it from a medical professional or what, but after the appointment, I got so excited. I am already booked in at High River to be seen next month and have my 18-week ultrasound requisition. It's like a switch just clicked in my brain and it hit me....I'm having a baby!!!

We're definitely going to find out if it's a boy or girl. I just can't handle the suspense. Before we got pregnant, i always said it HAD to be a girl - I refuse to have a boy! (like I have any control over that whatsoever, LOL) but now, it doesn't matter. as long as he/she is healthy and happy. I can't wait to present to Gemma her new baby sibling. I can't wait to see them playing together, fighting together, blaming each other, saying "I love you" to each other, etc.

I'm pumped.