Blue Baby

Yesterday, Gemma woke up at about her usual time and we had plans to maybe join a friend for a morning walk. I got her from her crib, gave her some milk, and then got myself ready. I turned the TV on for her to keep her busy while I was getting dressed and stuff. When i grabbed clothes for her and went to put them on her, i noticed her lips were blue. Her cheeks were blue, the tip of her nose was blue, her hands were a deep purplish blue, and her feet also. Of course all these parts were cold as ice and I just started to panic. Gemma is, for the most part, a very sweaty girl. She is hot all the time and usually needs to be dressed cooler than me so she isn't soaked with sweat. She slept in long sleeves and long pants and the house temperature was the same as always, so I don't know why she would have been extra cold. On top of that, i wondered if the cyanosis was from lack of oxygen or from cold and I started to freak out. She didn't act weird or seem out of sorts. She was watching TV and excited about her show as always and seemed normal enough. Still, it was so out of ordinary that i called the doctor in a panic and they told us to come right away. 

She had been sleeping more than usual, but i figured that was from her being exhausted from our holidays. She has been sleeping an hour or more extra at night and napping an hour or two more during the day. 

Anyways, the doctor said if it happens again, maybe he would like to send her for an electrocardiogram and a chest x-ray, just to make sure her heart isn't having issues sending the blood around her body. She was screaming so much (as per usual) at his office that he couldn't have a good listen to her chest and heart. He said obviously if she is passed out or not breathing or whatever, call 911.

Anyways, I spent the entire rest of the day in a complete funk, even though she turned out to be fine and her color soon came back. It felt like I lost 30 years of my life and I began having flashes of images of horrible things happening to her throughout the day. By the end of the day, i was bawling my eyes out and I eventually cried myself to sleep. 

I don't know if i can keep blaming the hormones for my state of mind, but what is going on with me?